I haven’t looked at this blog in about a year. Shortly after beginning the ‘cleanse’ – I became pregnant and gave birth to a baby girl in May. Crazy. I am enjoying getting to know my little bundle of pinkness. She is my sweet baby girl.
My boys are getting big. They fight with each other most of the time. It has been challenging for the last six months or so. I think the little one is just adjusting to no longer being the baby of the family. I’m hoping things get better between them when school starts in a couple of weeks. JK for the little guy and grade six for the big guy.
I have lost most of my baby weight. But, my belly still looks pregnant-ish even though I’ve lost the pounds per the scale. I don’t know what to do. Could my uterus still be swollen slightly 14 weeks later?
I am looking at life a bit differently (most of the time) as I almost bled to death eleven days after having my daughter. I had retained placenta. It was such a whirlwind of a month. I’m feeling pretty normal now though. I sympathize / empathize with people who are hospitalized now for sure. How brutal. I just wanted to yank out all of the tubes etc and run home. I was starved (on purpose) in preparation for surgery and couldn’t sleep well (as I was attempting to nurse my newborn). It wasn’t the easiest time but we survived.
Here I am. Back in action.
Today, I weigh 152.4 lbs – I feel a bit lighter. I have had a bit of a headache and a kind of garlic taste in my mouth. I was really tired yesterday afternoon as well. We shall see how today goes.
Today, I started a 30 day cleanse. My starting weight is a whopping 153.6 lbs – not good for me. So, hopefully this cleanse will help me to feel refreshed and kick start me to get back on a healthy path.
I’m not sure if there is any true benefit to cleansing but it has to feel good to spring clean the body… right?
I am going to document my 30 days of cleansing…
This morning, within the first half of an hour I felt a rumble in my intestines… off to the can I ran… could it be working this quickly? Or, was that just a coincidence? It seems kind of gross to talk about this sort of thing but I am likely the only one reading it… so it shouldn’t bother anyone too much.
I am thinking that if I write a few goals down… they may come to fruition.
- Learn to play a song on my guitar by heart (no notes in front of me).
- Learn to knit a scarf by the end of the year.
- Start walking for at least 20 minutes daily (starting today).
- Get back to the gym (in April when my work schedule slows down).
Feeling like a bit of a scatter-brain lately. Hoping clarity and calm will come with exercise.
I did not enjoy high school. I was miserable for most of the experience. I never really asked for guidance and should have because it would have made the move to university easier. Then, when I got to university, I never really asked for guidance until the last semester of school. If I had only met my mentor the first semester of school… life would likely be a lot different for me now. But, I’m okay with where I’m at. I do not have a Dr. Tom time-travelling therapist like ‘Being Erica’. But, don’t we all wish we could be given the chance to go back and do things differently just to see where we would be today. I could possibly be in the very same spot. It’s hard to say.
I see people from high school around town here and there… they possibly know my name but they don’t say hi. How awkward. It makes me feel like I’m in high school all over again. It makes me feel about one inch high. I hate it. Unfortunately, that is what you get for never leaving the place that you grew up in.
The other torture that I’ve subjected myself to is Facebook. Adding old high school ‘chums’ as friends… risky business. I commented on one old ‘friends’ photo that she looked great as she always did. She defaced me the next day. I guess I should not have looked at her newly posted photo which popped up in my freaking news feed. When I discovered the defacing… I felt like I was back in high school. I felt the same angst and heart palpitations. Why do I let these ghosts from the past bother me? Do we ever really get over high school and it’s torturous memories? I thought I had moved on but there seem to be a few old wounds that haven’t healed.
My advice to current high schoolers… be true to your own interests and ask for help, go to ‘guidance’ to help you with your future. Don’t look to your peers for guidance. Follow your own path. Your peers will likely go their own way and they seem to be able to sniff out posers who are lost – the lost posers get left behind. Lastly, like yourself, love yourself. You are number one. Do what is best for you (even if your ‘friends’ get sulky about it). These ‘friends’ will not be around forever.
We are building a new deck… ahem… I mean my husband and my dad are building a new deck. I watch them from the kitchen. Our 8 year old son is helping too… I better not forget to mention him because he is quite the little helper… hardhat and all.
It feels good to tear something down and start fresh… clean slate… from the ground up… new – even though I am just watching from the kitchen.
I miss fresh air walks. It looks beautiful outside but the sidewalks are icy and chunky, not ideal for my stroller wheels… therefore I am housebound with my 15 month old boy. He must be getting tired of looking at my pasty mug. Some warm spring sunshine would feel good about now… but I believe we have six more weeks of winter according to the majority of the ground hogs. What a boring bunch of words… kind of like my life currently.